sick.tired.depressed.frustrated.my.plight.

I'm at the edge of my sanity right now...

I'm so sick, tired, depressed and frustrated!

I kinda just wanna blow up and take this whole fucking world down with me!

Why is everything oh, so wrong?!!!

rage engulfs my chest...

I'm under a horrendic emotional stress...

if only I could scream. . .and let it all out!

if only I had some way to let these all out!

if only words can describe how i feel. . .

if only things were the same as before. . .

if only things did not change. . .

if only you. . .did not change. . .

if only things did not get colder. . .

then, maybe. . .things would be a bit more bearable for me...

Don't get me wrong my dear, I'm not blaming you for all these shit that's happening to me. . .
The one I blame is destiny. . .

why did she bring me close to you. . .just to take you slowly away?. . .

and what hurts more is that I'm at fault here too. . .


if only I could write better, I would write my heart out. . .
and then, maybe. . .things wouldn't be much harder. . .
maybe. . .I could let out a bit more of this pain. . .

if only I could cry a lot more. . .
if only guys are built to cry A LOT more. . .
then, maybe these emotions wouldn't build up as much. . .

It sucks to be here in the MIDDLE. . .in this case. . .
in between strong and weak. . .

If only I was strong, then, I wouldn't be affected as much by this. . .
If only I was weak, then, I could just cry my heart out. . .
And I wouldn't feel this pain. . .as much.


If only he wasn't too much of an ass. . .and respected my privacy. . .
If only he did not assume things. . .the wrong fucking things!
if only he did not have the ego of a fucking dictator!
then maybe I wouldn't feel the fucking way I feel right now. . .

if only. . .

if only there was someone here beside me. . .
if only there was someone to comfort me. . .
if only there was someone to understand me. . .right now.

I feel so. . .alone.
help me.

if only there was someone to hear my screams. . .
if only there was someone to hear THESE silent screams!